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hogwarts-facebook:

hogwarts-facebook:

MY PARENTS ARE COMING HOME IN HALF AN HOUR AND I DECIDED TO PLAY A PRANK ON THEM

THEY ALWAYS JOKE WHEN THEY LEAVE ME HOME ALONE “MAKE SURE YOU DONT KILL ANYONE” AND WALK AWAY LIKE ITS REALLY FUNNY

WELL ITS MY TURN TO BE FUNNY

SO I LIKE COVERED ALL OUR KNIVES IN BLOOD AND PUT BLOOD ALL OVER THE SINK AND KITCHEN

AND I MADE A BLOODY TRAIL TOWARDS THE GARAGE

AND WHEN THEY COME HOME THEY’LL FIND ME IN THE GARAGE WITH A GIANT BIN BAG STUFFED FULL OF CRAP

AND I’LL JUST BE SITTING THERE

GRINNING

WITH A KNIFE IN MY HAND

ok so MY DAD AFTERWARDS WENT TO MAKE TEA WHILE I GOT RID OF THE PAINT

SO THEN MY DAD MADE TEA FOR ME AND HE PUT THIS HUGE PIECE OF LEMON IN THE TEA SO I WAS LIKE OK, HE ALWAYS DOES THAT

BUT WHEN I WAS ABOUT TO FINISH MY TEA THE PIECE OF LEMON STARTED TO GET IN THE WAY SO I DECIDED TO REMOVE IT AND FINISH MY TEA IN PeECE

THEN I SCREAMED AND NEARLY DROPPED MY FUCKING CUP BECAUSE HE HAD SOMEHOW GOT A PICTURE OF A SLUG AND STUCK IT TO THE BOTTOM TO MAKE IT LOOK 3D AND I AM FUCKING TERRIFIED OF SLUGS OK

SO THATS WHY HE PUT THE FUCKING LEMON ON MY TEA TO COVER UP THE FUCKING SLUG WHICH LOOKED SO FUCKING REAL

MY FAMILY IS FUCKING CRAZY